Contrast

I was lowered down into the water. The diving suit felt heavy, the boots thudded into the bottom of the pool. I could make out the shapes of the two men waiting at the air pump. They spoke to each other as they waited for my signal. The pool was not the best test of the suit's capabilities, but we were checking the basics. The air pump hadn't been used in decades and the suit itself needed basic leak testing. I started wading to the deeper end of the pool. The water was now 2 feet above the top of the helmet. I breathed slowly, making the air last as long as I could.

3 minutes passed.

I decided it was enough and raised my hand. The men continued talking, now deep enough in conversation to have physically turned to face the each other. I waved harder, making small ripples on the surface. Nothing. My focus on my breathing broke. I was never comfortable with enclosed spaces. I took a few steps closer to the shallow end, my hand breaking the surface of the water. I splashed water at the men. They snapped out of their conversation and started unlocking the air seal. I felt the pull of the tube on the top of the helmet as air started siphoning through. I took a few steps back toward the deep end. As I walked, I looked back at the men. They were standing still, no longer chattering to each other. I stopped and stared back. I heard a faint gurgle from the air tube. The sound grew louder. Something was coming down the tube. I looked up to the vent. A drop of water splashed onto my face. I looked back at the blurry shapes of the men, they stood still. Even through the rippling water they seemed to be frozen in time.

Water started rushing into the helmet, I started to panic and move back to the shallow. The weighted boots seemed to be heavier than at the start of the test. I assured myself it was just fatigue, though I had hardly been exerting force. I tried to move quickly, but felt stuck after 3 steps. I turned to look at the men. They continued to watch. The pouring water echoed in the helmet, starting to disorient me. I felt something brush against my ear, though water had only filled to my jaw. I looked at the surface of water inside the helmet. Even through the brackish water I could see something was moving. I felt it brush against my neck. The water had reached my ear. I tilted my head back, trying to keep my nose out of the water. Small, sharp teeth pierced my neck. The tiny razorlike jaws to bite deeper and tear my flesh. I closed my eyes and screamed. I tried to move my arms and legs but the diving suit had grown too heavy. I felt more creatures hit my face as they dropped from the air tube. One started tearing at my cheek, another crawling into my ear, before starting to bore into the drum. The pain was excruciating. The water was now at my nostrils, even with my head pulled back. I felt the creature in my ear turn and bite deep into the canal wall. I opened my mouth to and yelled. Water clouded with blood rushed into my mouth. Creatures followed. My throat tore, my ears burned, my mind began tear apart.

My eyes opened wide and I gasped for air. I had woken from the nightmare shaking. My heart beating rapidly and my torso covered in a fine coat of sweat. My terror slowly dissipated and was replaced by confusion as I took in my unfamiliar surroundings. A yellow glow cut pierced the dark. The light peeking out from the underneath the bathroom door was dull, but bright enough to reveal the layout of the bedroom. I closed my eyes and breathed slower easier, trying to piecing the jigsaw together. I rolled onto my right and I saw her. She had her back to me. Her breathing was soft and rhythmic, I hadn't disturbed her. Her beautiful body moving in time with her slow breathing. She was beautiful. I moved closer and gently placed my hand on her waist. I brought my face against her exposed shoulder. I kissed her shoulder gently and touched my cheek to her, letting my hand drift to her stomach. She stirred slightly and sighed happily. My lips split into a smile. I kissed her shoulder again, and let my hand drift back over her perfect curves, savoring the feel of her skin under mine.

I turned away and lay on my back, looking up into nothing. I felt content.

I know I dont, I just want it

Dont

Let it go

Blarghcissism

Unfortunately, people confuse the fuck out of me. My misanthropy aside, I do not understand people. I'm not romantic, I'm not much of a conversationalist and I can't even begin to comprehend the feelings of others. In the shaved ape society, I'd like to think I'd have been one of the primitive tool wielders,than the gawping shit-flingers, thus, went looking for similar minded monkeys.

Turning to the internet has left me with narcissistic, overly emotional, pretentious, horny assholes. My feed constantly updates with unentertaining whinging, cries for attention, self-righteous babble and misinformed idiocy. I watch with the dread fascination associated with watching train wrecks.

Fortunately, friends such as the kaiju muse, the monk and the dancer have had positive influence and melted a small portion of the ice that fills my core. I am grateful, but still, for all intents and purposes, confused.

fray

With each passing moment it unravels a little more

Fork

The dull red glow of the traffic light gave the street a surreal quality.
The shadows cast by the moon had been diluted and distorted by the artificial light.
I slunk back into the seat, checking my rear view mirror. Nothing.
I gripped the wheel tightly, pushing my shoulder blades back as I stretched.
I closed my eyes and exhaled, releasing the wheel.

I scanned the intersecting street. The night seemed dead.
A slight wind was rolling an empty bottle down the footpath.
The indents on the glass sent soft tones reverberating down the empty city street.
I glanced back at the lights.
Still red.

My eyes wandered back to my mirrors. A car idled behind. Waiting.
I tried to study the outline of the driver. The shadowy visage stared back, unmoving.
The quiet rhythm of the bottle drew my attention back to the path.
I started to lose myself in the hypnotic melody.

A car horn blared, I jerked upright in my seat and moved my hand to the gearbox.
I started to push the accelerator, then paused.
The same dull red glare illuminated the intersection.
I glanced back into the mirror.

I watched the silouette for a reaction, but got none.
I looked back to the lights.
Still red.
I looked back into the mirrors, no sign of movement, only unsettling silence.

Without averting my gaze, I slowly slouched back into the seat.
We sit and wait.
I can hear the bottle rolling.
Closer this time, the scratching tones more rapid as the wind gathers.
The bottle nears the path edge.
The buckled concrete threatened to halt its melodic rumble.
My eyes drifted back to the lights.

Again the car horn breaks through the quiet.
I exhaled sharply and grip the wheel tightly.
The short blast echoed across through the street.
The traffic light continued to cast the ominous red glow over intersection.
My eyes darted to the mirrors.
The driver remained deathly still.
I turned to focus directly on dim outline of my antagonist.

I heard a hollow, resonating tone.
I turned to see the bottle drifting through the air.
Time seemed to slow as the vessel continued its short descent.
The bottle burst and sent hundreds of echoing bell tones ringing through the street.
The car horn blared again.
I snapped back to the intersection, muscles spasming from the shock.
I pushed hard on the accelerator.
The tyres squealed.
I shot forward into the intersection.
I glanced at the lights.
The mocking red glow growing brighter as I sped towards the corner.

I pulled the wheel hard to the right.
The car jerked violently at the sudden change in bearing.
Tyres began to drag, the engine screamed.

I took my foot off the accelerator and slammed it on the brake,
The car came to a stop I pulled to the side of the intersecting street.
I stared forward. My heart pounded in my ears.
I slowly turned to face the the intersection.
The indistinct form of the driver remained frozen in place.

The red haze flickered and dissipated.
The green light bathed the intersection an unearthly glow.
The car crept forward slowly, almost silently.
The tyre treads made soft noise as they gripped the bitumen.
The driver stopped at the lights.
Its car idled quietly, barely audible in the quiet night.

The Passing

I listen to the thrum of distant traffic.
The familiar noises of the night.
My eyes sting, my body slackens.
I stare at the ceiling, mind empty.

Slowly, the noise begins to quiet.
The thrum deteriorates into a hollow silence.
I feel a slow, rhythmic beat, start to pulse through my body.
My heart skips a count.

My senses cloud further, as the ripple penetrates my consciousness.
Feelings of dread and despair wash over my psyche.
I feel my muscles tighten in fear.
The steady pulse overwhelms my own rapid palpitations.

The atmosphere begins to grow thick with condensation.
The moisture clings to my body, I feel it drag on my skin.
I feel weak under its crushing weight.
Relentless throbbing overwhelms my senses.

My body feels numb.
The deafening pulse penetrates my core.
My eyes begin to close..
Cold air saturates my lungs..

The pulse slows..
I can feel a shift in the atmosphere..
The pressure starts to subside.
I can breathe.

The pulse fades, I grow weary.
My limbs start to relax.
My eyes sting.
I hear a faint thrum in the distance.